Hi world of the internet!
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Meaghan. As I’m writing this, I’m realising I really don’t have the same flair for writing blog posts as many others seem to have… But we’ll just go with it.
I’ve always wanted a space to share my creativity and my thoughts. I remember being about 8 and trying to start my own website about giraffes. I used to be absolutely OBSESSED with african animals, and for some reason, the idea of having a giraffe website excited my little 8 year old heart. Now that I look back on it, I can assure you there were many more interesting and important topics that I could have made a website on, but hopefully I won’t look back on this in 10 years and think the same.
Creativity is my way of breathing. Whether it’s painting, photography, creating something new and writing, I have been doing it since I was a kid. And I have always been too afraid to share it with the world (or when I do, it completely flops). I’ve always wanted a place where I could express myself in the way I wanted without the fear of being judged or misunderstood, as often happens on the internet. After thinking over this a lot over the past few months, I’ve realised that the only person who cares enough to judge me is myself. And I’m fed up with getting in my own way.
I’ve always found that starting something was always the hardest bit for me – everything just seems too overwhelming and confusing at the beginning and it stops me from doing amazing things. I think we all suffer from this in some way. We all seem to have this intense fear of failure which stops us from ever succeeding. I’m ready to start living without the fear of failure. I am ready to start being true to myself and being unapologetically who I am without giving a flying FUCK what anyone else thinks.
I heard a quote recently and it said something along the lines of “the only people that are judging you are the one’s that are doing less than you”, and this got me thinking about how we dim ourselves down to make those around us comfortable who are also dimming themselves down to make others feel comfortable. Why is that? Why do we stop ourselves from shining just because we’re afraid that we will outshine those who don’t even tend to matter to us? Why don’t we shine brighter, which helps give others permission to do the same? I’m sick of playing small, of staying safe and comfortable in my little box, caring about what the people that I didn’t even like in high school think of me. I know we all do this in some form. We fear that people from our past will look at who we have become and think “oh, she’s changed,” or “she’s a little alternative now, isn’t she?” But what are we really afraid of? Why do we care about the opinions of people who are completely irrelevant to our lives? I mean, I haven’t seen half the people I went to high school with in 3 years, I highly doubt that they care what I have to say.
In the end, I think there are just too many exciting things that we are all missing out on due to fear of being judged. I’m ready to move past this fear and freaking enjoy this life that seems to be speeding up as I get older and older. We all have such unique voices and stories, and if you take anything from this little ramble at all, I would want it to be to share what’s going on inside your head, even if it seems silly or useless information to you – I can assure you, someone out there is dying to hear about what you have to say.
Lots of love,
“Normality is a paved road: It’s comfortable to walk, but no flowers grow” – Vincent can Gogh